Monday, February 15, 2010
That Guy
Why does he have to be complicated?? He hasn't spoken to me in 3 months! He chose her over me. Which is fine. I am in no position to complain. I had gotten over the sting, the bruised ego. She's everything I'm not. He made his decision. So don't call me at 9:30 on a Thursday morning to "see how I am." I know what he wants. He wants me to pine after him, to always want him. Sure, if he marries her I'll be hurt. But I refuse to be his 2nd choice and if he doesn't want me, leave me alone. But the question I ask myself...do I want him to come back or not??
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Loyalties
When is enough enough? How do you know when it's time to make a change? I have been thinking and talking about making changes and now I need to nut up or shut up. When can you tell it's time?
When is time to quit your job? How much shit do you put up with before you say "no more." I have never been one of those people to beat my head against the wall, but lately I see myself headed that way. I am letting other people's craziness effect me. Mainly my boss. I refuse to placate him. He is driving us all crazy. He is hands down the most manipulative person I have ever met. He has a way of making everyone around him feel ashamed that they have disappointed him when you haven't even done anything wrong! I am typically a very loyal person. I stick close to my friends and allies. So how do you decide where you allegiances lie?
What does it take to cut those ties? I am not one for throwing someone under the bus, but I am not about to take the heat for someone else either. I resent like hell someone trying to take their problems out on me. If I thought I was being unreasonable then I would be looking at this from a different way, but everyone around me has the same problems. So when do you decide its time to jump ship or do you just ride out the waves?
When is time to quit your job? How much shit do you put up with before you say "no more." I have never been one of those people to beat my head against the wall, but lately I see myself headed that way. I am letting other people's craziness effect me. Mainly my boss. I refuse to placate him. He is driving us all crazy. He is hands down the most manipulative person I have ever met. He has a way of making everyone around him feel ashamed that they have disappointed him when you haven't even done anything wrong! I am typically a very loyal person. I stick close to my friends and allies. So how do you decide where you allegiances lie?
What does it take to cut those ties? I am not one for throwing someone under the bus, but I am not about to take the heat for someone else either. I resent like hell someone trying to take their problems out on me. If I thought I was being unreasonable then I would be looking at this from a different way, but everyone around me has the same problems. So when do you decide its time to jump ship or do you just ride out the waves?
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Enjoying the Single Life
I found is article on glamour.com. It was 8 Reasons to Enjoy Your Single Status. Insightful stuff. I thought it was funny because now that I am in a relationship I find that I definitely miss these things about being single.
#1. Your diet is your diet.
I am sick of Chinese food. I want to cook fish without him turning his nose up at me. There are so may things that I miss about cooking what I want. I have also given up one of my favorite restaurants because he doesn't like it. He drinks ALL my orange juice. I could go on about this for a while. You just never really know someone until you have to eat together every night.
#2. You can do errands without the dead weight.
I relish my "me time." So when I need to run my Saturday morning errands or my "Sunday after church grocery run," I want to go it alone. Sometimes it the only time that week I have to myself.
#3. You really get to know yourself.
This is true, but I will say one thing, I have learned a lot about myself since he moved in. But when you are alone, you aren't forced to do things you don't really like or interested in. You do things for you and you figure out what you want.
#4. You can be a good aunt.
I spent a lot of my time with my two year old nephew over the weekend and as soon as I left I missed him so much. I like that I can get to know him now and can focus on him. The baby was just born and now I get to spend time with both of them.
#5. You can develop talents and take up hobbies.
I keep saying I am going to write a book and learn to play the piano (again). I have all these things I want to do and sometimes I feel like he is dragging me down. Sometimes I feel obligated to do things he will like when I really want to do things I want.
#6. You actually get out of the house.
I think I might have gone out twice since he moved in. Once was with him. That's depressing. We don't really share a lot of interests and most of the time I want to go out with friends.
#7. You can travel.
I have all these places I wan to go and see. I plan all these vacations and look for places to go. I know it hurts his feelings that I want to go alone or with my friends. There are places I want to see for me.
#8. Loneliness hurts less.
It really does suck when you get used to having someone around all the time and still feel completely alone.
#1. Your diet is your diet.
I am sick of Chinese food. I want to cook fish without him turning his nose up at me. There are so may things that I miss about cooking what I want. I have also given up one of my favorite restaurants because he doesn't like it. He drinks ALL my orange juice. I could go on about this for a while. You just never really know someone until you have to eat together every night.
#2. You can do errands without the dead weight.
I relish my "me time." So when I need to run my Saturday morning errands or my "Sunday after church grocery run," I want to go it alone. Sometimes it the only time that week I have to myself.
#3. You really get to know yourself.
This is true, but I will say one thing, I have learned a lot about myself since he moved in. But when you are alone, you aren't forced to do things you don't really like or interested in. You do things for you and you figure out what you want.
#4. You can be a good aunt.
I spent a lot of my time with my two year old nephew over the weekend and as soon as I left I missed him so much. I like that I can get to know him now and can focus on him. The baby was just born and now I get to spend time with both of them.
#5. You can develop talents and take up hobbies.
I keep saying I am going to write a book and learn to play the piano (again). I have all these things I want to do and sometimes I feel like he is dragging me down. Sometimes I feel obligated to do things he will like when I really want to do things I want.
#6. You actually get out of the house.
I think I might have gone out twice since he moved in. Once was with him. That's depressing. We don't really share a lot of interests and most of the time I want to go out with friends.
#7. You can travel.
I have all these places I wan to go and see. I plan all these vacations and look for places to go. I know it hurts his feelings that I want to go alone or with my friends. There are places I want to see for me.
#8. Loneliness hurts less.
It really does suck when you get used to having someone around all the time and still feel completely alone.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
